The Trombone Case

This site has been created by the U.S. Consulate in Osaka to assist in the investigation of Missing Persons Case #3776RL, involving the disappearance of one Edward (“Eddie”) Trombone, an American citizen last known to have been living and working in the Kansai area of Western Japan. A manuscript believed to be written by Mr. Trombone, titled Teach Yourself Japanese, was recently found in the city of Osaka, in an apartment that had been overrun by cats and possibly a duck. The manuscript will be posted on this site, as it is restored and reassembled by staff members here at the Consulate, in the hope this may lead to someone coming forward with information regarding Mr. Trombone’s disappearance. humor, satire

Links to portions of the manuscript posted thus far are listed below, under Chapters. Go ahead and have a look. Readers may subscribe to posts in this unfolding mystery using that option in the sidebar on the right, and they are of course free to send this site’s link to people they think may be helpful in this investigation.

CHAPTERS
1. An appeal from U.S. Consular Officer Gerard K. Dirkins
2. Teach Yourself Japanese
3. There is a pencil here
4. A shrimp is on white rice
5. Hippopotamus
6. Tendon
7. Socrates, Fuji apples, and Evil
8. Nam-myoho-renge-kyo
9. Kanji are just pictures
10. An update on Consulate Staff
11. A Common Language
12. Two Birds with One Stone
13. Chicago Smelt: Mrs. Doyle’s Report
14. Byron’s
15. Weakly English
16 Latin (part 1)
17. Latin (part B)
18. Latin (part III)
19. Hindu Christmas
20. Child Labor
21. Battleship and Onions
22. Chūhai
23. Rokubutte
24. Click
25. All Strangers are Cops
26. Rehabilitation
27. Tsukemono
28. Martin Luther King
29. Confessions
30. The Book of Mormon
31. Honesty is the Best Policy
32. The Confession
33. A New Day
34. Freedom from Books
35. French Ventriloquism
36. The Common Cold
37. Life Raft
38. Culture Grind
39. Karma’s for Suckers
40. Karma’s for Suckers (Part 2)
41. The End of Karma
42. Cultural Abduction
43. Stay Puft Psychiatrist
44. Corner Boy
45. Hail Mary
46. The Thing With the Guy From the Place
47. I Got a Headache
48. Blue-sky Rocketship
49. Kọ Ara Rẹ Ni Ede Japanese
50. Redemption
51. Redemption (cont.)
52. Final Redemption
53. Mikoshi
54. You Say “Tomato”
55. Space Toilet
56. Space Toilet (number 2)
57. Japanese Gumption
58. Japanese Gumption II – The Archerfish

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